I have never felt so disgusting in my entire life. I’ve never been the kind of guy who has to shower every day, or even every other day. Still, I’m wondering how much Great Clips would charge just to wash my hair. I’m already looking forward to my first shower, when I can just scrape the grunge off of my body.
My throat hurts and my chest keeps tingling weirdly–the nerves are reconnecting, I guess. The drains are driving me insane, but my left side is still draining about 30cc per day.
I did poop today, though. Supposedly, that’s a good thing. But I’d almost rather be constipated; it’s really difficult to reach around and wipe my own ass.
Cognitively, I know that surgery is over. But I can’t see my chest yet, so it doesn’t feel real. It just seems like I’m feeling really shitty and out-of-it, and surgery hasn’t happened yet.
And then sometimes, it sinks in briefly, and I get excited at the prospect of looking normal in a few weeks.
E and I went out again, and someone asked for my ID when I presented my card, since I don’t look like I could be [birth name]. But, I haven’t been able to afford to change my name yet, so I’ll just have to keep making that Johnny Cash joke for a while longer.
